This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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