there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
