you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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