every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
