You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
