I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Randomize
