just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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