yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
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