I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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