Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
How naked do you want me to be?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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