worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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