New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
