He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
false alarm. still invincible.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize