u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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