hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize