4 words: hood of his car
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
