he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
