How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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