Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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