i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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