And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
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i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
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He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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