Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
