Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
