He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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