hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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