You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
