Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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