If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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