Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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