Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
