I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
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