He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
