I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
