You're so nebulous sometimes
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize