Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
