Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize