just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize
