Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
