My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
