apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
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