I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
