I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
