don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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