Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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