Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
