just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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