Don't you send me to vm
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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