Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
How does it feel to date your dad?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
