I just saw a hot homeless man
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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