You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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